NOROOZ MOBARAK

Well, here it is. I am an Iranian with no proud whatsoever and with all of it at the same time. I am not a maniac fanatic nationalist but I'm also a "good" Iranian who doesn't like the rituals, religion, make up, and all that jazz about being an Iranian. So, in the middle of this no where, I don't know where the hell I'm heading to. I run away from whatever Iranian around me, either the "intellectuals" or "the fake Tehran geles (Los Angeles)", and that is totally awkward. Normally, the people from the same Nationality or background easily mingle if they are out of their home country, but I simply cannot.

I think in some ways I ran away from where I grew up, from the people and their daily lives. It's not because I dislike it or it was too much pressure which it was but because everything about it was too much. For God sake, why don't I feel that I owe something to my country? Am I being rootless and disrespectful to my "own" people? Am I being snobbish? No, I don't think so. It's only that I don't feel that I belong to any fucking region. I just owe my parents and my brother and sister. I think I feel owing to people I love.

Anyhow, the thing is that here in New York, or even in London when I was or any other fucking city that I go as an academic people expect me to write about Iran and its "issues"! What the hell! I don't want to. I need no interaction between Iran and the world. I just said that I ran away from it. I need some tranquility. i need no more news, no more politics, no more info about anything. I need to play my music, read and write, that's it. I don't wanna talk about Iran. It became a creature for the outer world, this Iran!

Actually, I don't know how to describe it, this magic pot. At the same time I so like and and so dislike it. But I cannot talk about disliking it to the people that now nothing of it. I have the right to talk about it even if it is some bullshit and about my frustration living there but the people that know nothing of it, assume that we Iranians are barbarians. But we are not. I just cannot tolerate it because of the existing oppression over everyone.

They (Iranians from two generations, the before and after the revolution) that before the revolution everything was great except the "shah" that they wanted him to resign but no one really realizes that Iran was always the place of past glories, everything there is based on past tense. This is Iran. Islam was always there after the Arab's invasion, with one way or another, some women even before the revolution were wearing veils and robes. So, how do I as an academic musician want to address all these issues? I don't know.

I have never read the Iranian Contemporary history, as I so get disgusted of all the stupidities. I seriously become furious.

Whatever it is, it is my home country, where I found my closest friends, where I found out that I need to travel all the time, where I realized how I can forget and get over my past more easily, where I became so eager to leave it and not to live there anymore!

Today is our new year, THE NEW YEAR, the first day of spring. Isn't it nice? Iran is the only country that has this. We celebrate the coming spring.

It's a new day,
It's a new dawn...

My brother and I decided to stay in touch by skype to celebrate. He lives in Birmingham, UK. And we also decided to drink whiski while we are chatting. Well! once again cyber space! My sister and mum went on a trip that has no access to telephones and internet. My father is lives in Tehran and he is alone same as me and my brother so after that we call him to tell him happy new year. Life is such a story...

SALEH NO MOBARAK! (in Farsi)
Happy New Year